What is Ego? Is your Ego an amigo or a foe? Is it out to get you, trip you up, or make you suffer? Perhaps it is a loyal friend showing you where you can mend within.
Many believe the ego is a bad part of us, something to overcome, destroy, or disempower. The ego gets blamed for many things, like a scapegoat for our shadow side.
The ego is not a bad or wrong part of us.
It is a co-pilot and assistant that helps us see ourselves and navigate the tumultuous terrain of life. Like a good friend who tells us when we are messing up, the ego shows up when life gets rough and helps us sort through things. It holds a mirror for us to see ourselves. The reflection we see is us, although sometimes hard to swallow and easier to project blame on our amigo, it is not ego. The ego is just holding the mirror.
Everything in life has a shadow side; each day, person, relationship, and experience has a shadow and light side. Our shadow side is often referred to as the ego, but they are two very different things. If we can accept that we are both sides of the yin-yang, that we have a shadow and light side, and that both are expressed in our lives, then we can let the ego off the hook and begin building a healthy relationship with this valuable ally. If you divide or demonize any part of yourself, you are creating an internal state of separation that will keep your vibration in conflict and contradiction.
To become whole and free, you must love and embrace all parts of your being.
We would not demonize our inner child or our higher self. These are two other aspects of human consciousness that we must embrace and accept to gain their magic and gifts. The ego is the same; it carries many gifts that we can experience when we stop running from it or blaming it for everything.
Our shadow side is our accumulated unresolved pain, patterns and programs, and our disowned parts of self that we have rejected. The shadow side acts in fear and insecurity, doubt and worry. It overcompensates and masks our pain until it can’t, and then it expresses from a traumatized place instead of love.
The ego says, “Hey, amigo, your shadow is showing.” The ego wants to help us see our shadow side so that we can heal it.
Get to know your ego, let go of the lens, perception, and beliefs that you have seen previously, and make a commitment to befriend this part of yourself. Just this decision alone will make you feel like coming home, returning to a place where you are more whole and less divided. It is like when you forgive an old friend, and you exhale all the tension that you have contained to keep the offense alive. It is liberating and freeing inside.
Instead of demonizing the ego or any part of yourself, seek to understand and befriend.
When your shadow side rears its head again, and you see that you were acting unkind or unconsciously towards yourself or others, recognize what the shadow side is expressing and what your ego is pointing you to that needs healing. Face and embrace the shadows and let them dissipate in self-love and acceptance.
Bestow grace from your heart space onto your disgraced parts and welcome all parts back into the love in your heart. Have gratitude that you can see yourself, and you can pick yourself up, clean yourself off, and do better the next time. This is the gift of the ego experience, to see and know thyself more deeply. The ego is a teacher, healer, guide, and ally.
In gratitude and acceptance, you will begin to recognize the ego as an old friend and ally who only wants to help you live your best life.